Thursday, January 30, 2014

Short Shots

      

          This will probably be a short post but I want to continue on my posting everyday train that I appear to be on (chug chug).
        Today was relatively okay. Nothing super eventful in the positive or negative. It is a work day (bartender work day to say the least I started at 9pm) I took the advantage to sleep in until around 3pm after being awoken only one as K (K shall be the guy that is floor dwelling so I don't have to keep calling my two friends floor dwellers because they actually are my friends). After awakening from my slumber which I very much needed A (girl floor dweller and my good friend) went for lunch to meet up with K to here some of my work gossip; yes we work at the same bar, because he didn't have the best day. I ate pizza and felt relatively okay about it or at least had other things to do to keep the guilt in the back of my mind. I then went over to my work place for a coffee which honestly was about half a glass of liqueur thanks to my lovely bartender co-worker. I sauntered in with style rocking my jeans slouchy don't care almost see through top, hair a mountain of tangled bun and glasses as to not be blind in lack of contacts; unlike what I usually look like while I am actually working so the regulars had quite the laugh.
      I went home in need of a shower and got caught up in tap tap on my phone before actually submerging myself into steaming water of glorious cleanliness. Eventually I did shower, blow out my hair and put a face on to leave the house in order to be a presentable want to get drunk off of you bartender. I had a nice shift because it was comedy night and made significantly more tips than the previous night. I want to one day go into the emotional and physical impacts of my life in the service industry but will perhaps save that post when I have it more planned out. To sum it up it can either be an escape from how I feel about me, almost like acting, no one really knows your story and feel the need to tell you their story while purchasing trust serem in the form of beer from you. Or it can be a stressful environment of needing to be good enough, pretty enough and impressive enough for your unpleasurable boss; feeling insecure and having life run through your head and being impacted by rude customers. I work solely for the fact that I need a roof over my head and some of the things I like to do for myself do cost money.
      I also finally have two days off tomorrow and Friday where hopefully I will finally be able to get some things done, like laundry, dishes and the always stressful grocery shopping because I wouldn't mind some vegetables. So far I have tomorrow ideas planned out, my friend and I (an actual roommate who lives in her own room in this house) want to go get our nails done, and I think I might get fake nails to help not purge because it hurts my throat quite a bit and I keep thinking of the fact that my teeth are already seeing the damage. My eating disordered thoughts also say that if I know I can't purge than perhaps I will be better and back on track with some intense restricting. Also a side note I wish it were warmer because walking and hiking is one of my favourite forms of exercise. I am also considering going dancing or out drinking but haven't quite decided on that.
      As of now it is nearly 4am (oh the joys of living a nocturnal bar life) and K & A are fast asleep on the floor and my mind and body have not completely winded down for sleep so I think I shall indulge in some television shows online, particularily Dance Moms first (guilty pleasure for sure) and then see if I can drift off and be functionable at a decent hour tomorrow.
       Thus ends my daily ramble and wishing everyone sweet, inspiring, motivating dreams.
xoxoxo

          also yes the above picture is me a few weeks ago and that is the aforementioned slouch don't care almost see through top.

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