"How are you?" says the bank teller. The girl at the other side of the counter squeaks out a "I'm good." If only it were socially acceptable to pour your emotions out to your friendly bank teller or at least whisper "I'm disappearing and drifting away into a world filled with grey." If only. This girl walks wondering what it feels like to be a happy human. Questioning her humanity and sanity is a daily event. If only she was ignorant to psychological terms of depression, depersonalization, and psychosis she could do something other than label. Not that being ignorant would make the suffering anymore bearable, perhaps even worse. If only it were acceptable to talk to your bank teller. The bank teller could save her.
-- needless to say I am not having a good day. I hadn't eaten anything till about 6pm where I had pasta and tomato sauce. I got in trouble for refusing to buy cheese at the grocery store and coming home with flavoured water, and 5 calorie jello cups. Of course the trouble wasn't about the calories it was about the fact I was sent out for cheese if I wanted cheese.
I know sometimes I wonder why even bother asking someone "how are you today" because it is not as if they actually want to know. Why not say something like it is good to see you or we are happy you are here something else that does not require people to lie simply for the sake of keeping up with social expectations.
ReplyDeleteAnyway I'm sorry your having a rough day by the way. hope your day gets better.
with love,
~ell
Ahh, well I know all too well about that well-meaning "how are you" and the mandatory answer; don't we all? I can spend a whole day, being annoyed that this question is never answered correctly. I hope you'll have a better day tomorrow.
ReplyDeletedude. i know that exact thought process. i send you so much love. <3
ReplyDelete